"HOW TO LIVE IN THE CHURCH"
INTRODUCTION
When Jesus Christ called you to follow Him, and you accepted, He was
calling you not only to eternal life but to an entirely different way of life!
Here at Open Bible Fellowship it is our joy to discover all the wonderful ways
of the Lord, which lead to the abundant life God has for us. We desire
to be the kind of people and New Testament Church that He wants us to be.
This new life is to be bathed in the love of God through relationships with
Him and His people. Not to experience these relationships is to miss out
on the will of God!
“If we love one another, God abides in
us, and His
love
is perfected in us.” I John 4:12
And
“…The one who does not love his brother whom he has
seen,
cannot love God whom he has
not seen. 21And this commandment we have from Him,
that the one who loves God should love his brother also.”
I John 4:20-21
So God’s Whole Purpose For
Us Then Is This:
“What we have seen and heard we proclaim to you also,
that you also may
have fellowship with us;
and indeed our fellowship is
with the Father,
and with His Son Jesus
Christ.” I John 1:3
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Sometimes we become surprised when people do not act correctly; we think, "I
thought they were Christians." But, correct attitudes and actions do not
happen automatically; they must be learned. So we must understand that
the Lord's ways must be learned and applied. We must see others and
ourselves in the church as needing to be changing and growing.
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“Church
Hurts” occur in churches. People have not learned to relate with other
fellows Christians, as they should. Churches do not operate as God
desires; Pastors are frustrated. And, when problems
arise, rather than coming to a good resolve, there are hurts and a breakdown
in relationships. And, the outreach and effectiveness of
the Church of Jesus Christ is weakened. But it does not need to be like
this; that’s why we are having this study of God's Word. "Show Me Thy
Ways, O Lord!"
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.

INTRODUCTION (Continuing ...)
Even as you are reading this you may be thinking this applies to others- not
you; yet inevitably you WILL cause some hurt by your actions, attitudes,
inactions or simply by wrong procedure. There are reasons for all this.
But if we learn how God wants to structure the church and see how we are to
relate to one another in different circumstances, we will avoid problems and
be, rather, strengthened, blessed and effective. That's why the
Scriptures tell us-
“I Write So That You May Know
How One Ought To Conduct Himself
In The Household Of God”.
I Timothy 3:15
After 50 years of life in churches
and 25 years of ministry I have discovered
that many of the experiences churches go through are commonly repeated, though
at the time the people may feel it is unique, it is actually very common.
This is what I call "The Mouse Theory": "If you see one there will
be a lot more around." I've learned if you let mice go, they start
making real messes. So too, problems we encounter are not unique but
common. But, if we learn to do things right in the first place we will
have a neat, orderly, sweet house.

Did you know if, at the beginning of this year on
January 1, if you allow one mouse to thrive and have babies who in turn will
have babies who can all thrive, by the end of the year on December 31, there
would be 34,000 mice? That's the way it is with problems in the church
and in our lives. That's why it's important to understand how to
identify and change problems and bad habits before they thrive. It makes
a big difference. Keep the Mouse out of the House!
When we accepted Jesus into our lives, and are born
again, a new spiritual baby life began within us. But that's just the
beginning of the growing process; now our minds, thoughts, attitudes and
actions still need to be changed and conformed to the ways of the Lord (Romans
12:1-2; I Cor. 3:1-3). Most of the Bible was written to God's people on
occasions of their needing correction and an understanding of how God wants us
to live.
We ALL need to learn the ways of the Lord and apply
them to our lives. To think otherwise, is to be proud and arrogant.
God stands against the haughty in heart (I Peter 5:5); but those who are
humble, gentle and allowing the Lord to change them and mold them will truly
become great in His Kingdom!
We ARE Of Those Who Want The Lord To Work In Our Lives.
We ARE Of Those Who Want To See A Strong, Healthy Church.
We ARE Of Those Who Want To Have Jesus Manifest In Our Lives.
“Show me Thy ways, O Lord;
Teach me Thy paths.
Lead me in Thy truth, And
teach me:
For Thou art the God of my salvation;
on Thee do I wait all the
day.”
Psalm 25:4-5
A SPECIAL NOTE
ABOUT SIGNING ON EACH LESSON
At the end of each
lesson there is a place to sign off on the lesson. The purpose of this
is to give special attention to the thought of each lesson and apply it to my
life as an individual.
This is not to get
everyone to conform to mindless obedience in the church; rather it is to help
each person see the importance of the Biblical idea and to make a conscious,
special, effort to apply the lesson into their thoughts and character.
This application will help our church be the way God wants us to operate.
If you disagree or have questions about it, don’t just sign it anyway; rather
talk to the Pastor or teacher about it in order to find further understanding
together.
We do not want to be
only hearers of the Word and not doers of it. We need to be open to
changing the way we are. By signing we are taking special thought to
take a look at how we will change to be the way God wants us to be.
I have had the
experience, after some problem has arisen of going back to the people who
violated one of these principles to have them respond by saying, “Oh, we are
just not like that.” But that is the very point; we are to change!
We are not to go by our old ways. We are to be conformed to the image of
Christ. So, for instance, when people are not open to share their
misunderstandings and just keep things bottled up until it explodes, they are
not following the Biblical injunction that we are to be open and honest in
“speaking the truth in love”.
Each of these lessons
cannot be stressed enough. Each one of us must take a serious look at
conforming ourselves to the principles of God, or there will continue to be
problems rather than blessings. For we are to be a church that is a
loving, open, growing, peaceful, united, joyful, fellowship of believers,
being conformed and changed daily into the image and character of Christ.
Is your heart and will open to change. Are you
willing to allow the Lord to change you and teach you? Are you willing
to die to yourself and be the way Jesus wants you to be, or is there a spirit
of pride welling up in you to want to fight the changes the Holy Spirit and
the Word of God are calling you to make?
Let’s do a practice
signing right now!
Lord, help me to be open to hear,
understand and apply into my life the truths that You want developed
into my life and character!
Signed
_________________________________________________

CONTENTS
1. Love Is The
Greatest
6
2. Team Work
8
3. Freedom
10
4. Keeping Out Anger
12
5. Openness
14
6. Preventing Gossip
16
7. Correction
18
8. Unity
20
9. God’s Purpose For
Authority
22
10. Working With
God's Leadership
24
11. How God Has Set Up
The Church
26
12. Understanding Elders
28
13. Understanding Headship
30
14. Complaining Or
Contributing
32
15. Giving
34
16. Grace, Grace, Grace
36
Membership Application
37
This study
is based on using the New American Standard Bible,
However,
other translations should work fairly well with this study.
There is
available an answer book as well.
Page Numbers In Italics follows References
In Our Church's Blue NIV Bible For Easy
Locating.
ãRev. Wallace Shea 1990, 1993,
revised 2000
Open Bible
Fellowship
2662 NE 102 Ave.
Ankeny,
Iowa 50021
515-964-8544
LOVE IS THE GREATEST!
Have you ever seen a game in which some team member
pressed through to score a point, only to find he was going the wrong way and
actually scored against his own team? It happens.
Jesus says it will happen with people in the church
also; those who think they are doing great things for God will in the end,
find out they didn’t do the will of God, in fact they were doing more harm
than good; they didn’t even really know Jesus. (Matt. 25:31-46 and
Matt.7:21-23)
I have seen, often, where people get so wrapped up in
“Ministry” they fail desperately in the basics. Some people may have
great abilities and gifts and talk a lot about a relationship with God; yet
they do not have a good love, acceptance, thoughtfulness, or hunger towards
having a supportive fellowship with others. In their rush to ministry
they start running over people and become harsh and thoughtless. The end
result is a score for the enemy of the church. Wouldn’t it be tragic for
you to invest in ministry only to find out you failed in the Lord’s eyes?
It can happen! The Key Difference?
-LOVE!
Most everybody will agree love is the most important
thing. When Jesus was asked what was the greatest commandment, Jesus
told us we were to Love God AND Love one another (Matt. 22:36-40).
Yet Love is presumed upon. Talking the talk, but not simply "coming down
to earth and living with the rest of us!" It takes humility and putting
others first. Read Romans 12:10-14. The greatest struggle in the
church has been for people to simply come to Fellowship Groups where we have a
chance to get to know one another (which services can't facilitate). How
can we pray for one another, love one another, share our burdens and grow
together if we don't even relate to or know one another? In our church
therefore all this is a necessity in becoming true to Jesus in our faith and
being the kind of real Church Jesus wants us to be!
Love is demonstrated in its actions, not in its
acclamations. (Romans 5:8 and James 2).
It is not enough to just know Love is needed. We must know how love
acts! Do We Need To Learn How To Live In The Church? Absolutely!
LOVE IS THE GREATEST
How is it possible for someone to have great ministry,
even have an impressive, spiritually powerful ministry, and yet be counted as
a big zero in God’s evaluation? (I Cor. 13:2) (p1114)
. .
________________________________________________________________________
On the other hand, it is a wonderful thing to be on the
receiving end of the ministry of love! Rewrite I Corinthians 13:4-7
(p1114) in a way to express how people will be
acting toward you if they are acting out of love. Replace “Love” with
“They are being...” We will start it out... They are being: patient
with me, …
(Thinking then too that we should be this
way towards others):
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Read John 15:12-13 (p1046) and answer the following
questions based on this truth:
1.)
From what Jesus is telling us are our emotions to tell us who and when
to love? Why?
_________________________________________________________________
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.

Keep The Mouse Out of the House!:
Having studied this lesson I realize the importance of all
this and commit
myself to being gracious,
accepting, and loving of everyone! If something
is done or said I could take
negatively I will instead look to the heart and take everything in the best
way. I will not hold to bitterness but rather rejoice in the love and
grace we share together.
Signed ___________________________________
TEAM WORK
Love demands by its character, caring and
involvement! While many people can talk the talk of Christianity and
attend church services and even enjoy the benefits of the church, yet for the
true disciple of Jesus, our love and faith are demonstrated by doing what is
His will.
To not be involved with the people of God and working
supportively together, as we have already seen, is to be outside of God's will
and character. Indeed there are many "Mavericks" who act out of arrogant
attitudes: they don't need anyone else, they can minister better than anyone
else, no one else is as committed as they are, they
can worship God themselves and don't need the church.
Rather than blessing the Lord by loving His people for
which He came and died, their arrogant attitude
keeps the church apart, hurting and weak. Yet Jesus looks for His people to be
one body.
We can always do more together than we can alone.
But this takes a great change of heart and attitude to really understand and
appreciate this. It means we must learn the ways to be patient, work
with one another, forgive, encourage, think of others more than ourselves etc.
In short, we must start living the real Christian lifestyle. Are you
ready to put down your own life in service to others? Are you ready to
be on the Lord's Team? That's a big challenge isn’t it? That is the
Lord's will and way isn't it? Isn't it?
TEAM WORK
We MUST come to understand how important involvement is in
the church. God uses the analogy of the individual as being a member of
a living body:
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.
Thought:
What will you say to someone the next time they say, "I
don't need the church, I can worship God better out in nature in my fishing
boat"?
Keep
The Mouse Out of the House!:
I realize now through this study that God's personal
ministry to me
and my ministry to Him cannot
really be fulfilled outside of the Church.
I therefore reject the notion that I can serve God and be
fine by myself apart
from the church. I will
see myself as a part of God's team, the Body of Jesus by our being together in
Open Bible Fellowship.
Signed ___________________________________
FREEDOM
What Wonderful liberty and freedom we truly have in
Jesus!!! "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty!"
II Cor. 3:17. In fact Jesus said you can discern what is of Him by
the fruit. Where He is there is freedom. We are free from a lot of
legalisms and bondage. Our church is to be the fellowship of God's
people who have found freedom in their lives. We have freedom to think
and see for ourselves what God’s truth is. There is strength and joy in
this.
One of the reasons people like to stay away from
churches is because they feel their freedom is imposed upon. They
may feel they are judged and categorized if they think or believe a little
differently. The sad truth is, often that is the case. Yet, that
is not in the character of God. We cannot be that way.
As Christians we are blessed people who can know truth
and have great freedom. We must understand how to
handle truth with grace, love and openness. We must understand how to
relate to other church members and non-believers who may hold different
opinions. We will find new freedom to share more openly when
people know we truly care about them and have their trust.
FREEDOM
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.

Keep The Mouse Out of the House!:
Realizing that real growth and freedom comes about by
being able to be
Open to reason and freedom of expression, I will offer
this to others in the
Church and to myself!
Signed
___________________________________
KEEPING OUT ANGER
When we are wronged or someone does something with
which we do not agree, a natural reaction to that situation is anger.
There are times when anger is appropriate and times when we need to be
gracious to not take offence where none was intended. It is important to set
our church as a place where people are gracious with each other instead of
quick to get upset. And we certainly do not want to have a place where we
feel like everyone needs to be "walking on egg shells", do we!
There are usually different ways a person can take a
comment or action. The first step to avoid problems with anger is to
look at things in the most gracious way. Do you really think
they meant to hurt you, or was it simply an unintentional offense? If
they did not mean it to your harm, why let the devil stir up unnecessary
strife by taking something in the worse way possible?
What would be worse: (check one)
____being wrong by giving someone the benefit of
the doubt who really deserved your anger?
____being wrong by giving someone your anger and
distrust who meant no harm?
Do you think it is better to error on the side of grace
rather than to error at giving undue anger?
Remember Satan is always there to try to spark and fan
a flame to bring discord. But we will not allow that. We are not
ignorant of his designs. Giving grace neutralizes all offenses.
Always keeping open communication waters down any
opportunities for flames to grow.
KEEPING OUT ANGER
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.
Keep
The Mouse Out of the House!:
O God, I see it is necessary that I live as a gracious
person and not as an
angry one. O God, help me
to change by being patient instead of being
quick to anger or take offense.
Help me overcome my past and live the way you want. I will do my part by
setting my will to forgive all and change into a being a person of grace.
Signed ___________________________________
OPENNESS
Have you ever walked into a freshly cleaned house
and enjoyed the atmosphere of it? It smells and feels good doesn't it.
And we know there is a difference between just an aerosol having been sprayed
or real cleaning having been done.
The house of the Lord is to be that way also.
It is to be a refreshing change from the world. Our
"Communications” is our house maintenance policy. If we have a
good house maintenance policy, we will keep the house of the Lord clean and in
order. If we do not understand the Lord's communications orders, it will
be like a household in which we only live but do not clean or keep good order.
Different people have different attitudes and
approaches towards handling situations. Some take the "sweep it
under the rug" approach. We know what stink that eventually brings.
Some may feel they just don't like talking to people. But the reality is
we all communicate anyway; so it’s only a matter of learning how to
communicate correctly, God's way.
And, yes Our Father expects His children in His household to apply themselves
and put forth the effort in learning what He expects of us.
OPENNESS
According to Ephesians 4:15 (p1135), we should
speak _____________in ____________ What is the
result of such communication?
______________________________________________
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.
Keep
The Mouse Out of the House!:
I
understand that in order to keep our church, the House of
the Lord,
with an open, clean, wonderful
atmosphere, I MUST never let confusion,
hurts, complaints or being
upset about differences remain. I commit myself to always
being open to communicate with those involved
and not run on any presumptions. I will by this, keep my mind and heart
clear of misunderstandings and bad feelings.
Signed ___________________________________
PREVENTING GOSSIP
In learning to be wise and gracious in our speech,
we also then need to be aware of the tricky issue of gossip. It is a
slippery thing to get a hold of, as far as what it is and how to deal with it.
One thing we will see here is how serious of an issue it is. It leads to
misunderstandings, divisions, judgments, and strife.
Let us
define gossip in this way: Gossip is talking to others about rumors
or complaints in which the speaker is speaking to someone
who does not have the power and authority in the situation to be
directly involved.
PREVENTING GOSSIP
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.



Keep
The Mouse Out of the House!:
I know this is a tricky issue to deal with, but I will try
very hard to watch and when any disparaging remarks start being made by
anyone, I will stop it and say, "Don't tell
me about it, you need to talk to them or with someone who can do
something about it, or be quiet! Don't spread roomers,
I am committed to not being a part of gossip!

Signed ___________________________________
CORRECTION
As we have just seen within our last lesson,
sometimes we are forced to make a correction. In the church we
focus on love, grace and acceptance, so it is hard for us, as it should be, to
have to correct some situation. Yet the scriptures are full of commands
to the church in regards to corrections. For a church not to say "No" to
wickedness, strife, or immorality, is to accommodate it, even affirm it.
Maturity calls for balance and seeing all dimensions
of an issue God wants us to understand. Maturity sees evenly both sides
of the coin. When we talk about correction we must have the mature,
proper understanding.
First let us talk about the one side of the coin we
may be more familiar with. As we read Matthew 7:1-5 (p.939) we
understand Jesus says we are not to judge lest we be judged. And, He
also tells us we are not to look at the speck that is in our brother's eye
when we don’t see the log that is in our own.
Indeed, this must be a reality and a part of our
lives as gracious, non-judgmental people. We must not
become "nit-picky" people always telling
others their faults. Let not this lesson be perceived by anyone to think
we have license to be finding fault and telling others their faults.
As the saying goes: "Whenever my hand is pointing at
someone, I have three fingers pointing back at me!
Now, with that clearly understood, we need to see
the other side of the issue of correction. It is something that God
expects and commands us to do. But we have to understand its proper
place and benefit in the church; for indeed it is in the scriptures for us to
understand and properly apply.
CORRECTION
NOTE:
Included in this web page is the first page of each
lesson.
Each lesson in the study comes with two parts.
We are only giving the first part here on the web.
The second part contains fill in the blank studies
with references to scriptures.
The Full Study is available in Book Form.
We retain all rights and you may not reproduce and
give it to others, but you may print one copy and use it for yourself.
If you wish the full study and right to use it contact Pastor Shea at:
pastor@openbiblefellowship.org
Costs:
$10.00 each plus shipping.
Keep The Mouse Out of the House!:
This is an issue, which takes more maturity to understand,
but I realize that it is God's command and it does come out of love, therefore
I understand that without being nit-picky or judgmental, sometimes, serious
sin requires that out of love, we may need to give and receive correction
within the church. I know this is to only come out of the fear of
God and the love of God.
Signed ___________________________________
UNITY
This is a subject that is more near and dear to
the hear of Jesus than it is probably to any of us.
The people who follow Jesus are His body and He knows it is in the unity and
fellowship where He and we have such a great blessing. We really need to
open ourse